At one of my high school reunion, I
was asked to give some meaningful advices to the current high-schoolers then.
So, inevitably at the end of my speech, I said, “Aim high and you can do it!” I
am one of those who believe in goals. Without goals, I feel like I am driving
in circle without any destination. Without goals, I feel like I am
doing things that never end. Without goals, I feel like I am in a limbo state. I
believe for an individual to be successful, a goal needs to be set and aim as
high as one could. Exactly how high should our goals be?
One wise mom once told me that we
all need to struggle to reach our goal. She said that if the goal is too easy,
then it is no longer challenging and the goal becomes no value. Come to think
about it, if we have been doing the same job for years, it becomes part of the
routine and it is no longer challenging. After awhile, we are bored and started
to look for a change. What exactly are we looking for? A new set of challenging goals perhaps. Just the thought of it gives us
a little bit of chill, but also the thrill. The chill of failure, and the thrill for the
challenge.
My girls were very lucky. They met
one of the best teachers they have during fifth grades. Both girls were lucky
enough to have Mr. W as their home room and math teacher. Mr. W
challenged them all right. He challenged
his students by teaching them math and grammar aiming for 7th grade
students. At first both girls were struggling, but toward the end they did
extremely well. Somehow, he set out a challenging quest for them to thrive on.
Mr. W had played a big role in both girls’ attitude in learning as
he interleaved the challenging goals in their head. .
Okay, not everyone has that type of
teachers that could mentor and challenge them so they could aim high. How
exactly we can get our children or perhaps ourselves to take the challenging
goals? Perhaps we should push the limit. Perhaps we should push higher. Perhaps
we should aim higher each time.
--courtesy of arthurblue.deviantart.com
--courtesy of arthurblue.deviantart.com
Let's say we finally discover ways to aim high for ourselves or for our children. Now the questions that occasionally come to my mind, what happens when we realize that we could no
longer keep up with the goals? What happens when we realize that we have set
unrealistic goals for ourselves? Or better yet, when someone has given us
unrealistic goals? After we have repeatedly trying to achieve the impossible
and yet the impossible is unreachable. Should we step back and re-prioritize
our goals?
I am well aware of the phrase,
"sky is the limit." Yes. It is a wonderful expression to keep us
upbeat and motivate us to reach our goals. Like I mention earlier, I am all
about goals myself. On the other hand, I want us to also realize that we need
to step back before we devastate ourselves. We need to make sure our goals
don't destruct us. We should also know when to stop when the
goals has become a drag in our life, when we are no longer thriving for them, when we are feeling miserable because of them.
It is great to have a goal in mind,
in fact, the more challenging, the more fascinating it is. But yet, at the same time,
let’s pause once in a while in our journey to examine whether our goals, are
indeed in line with our emotional need.
Until next stop,
Journey of Life
Journey of Life
My fourteen year old, Pepper, came to me the other day and told me that she didn't want to go Piano lesson that very day. Reason being? Her piano teacher assigned her to finish 100 pages of piano theory in one week and she had tons of things to do that week. She was worried that her teacher may not be happy with her. I advised her to let her teacher know what she can and can not commit to. Inform the teacher that she had done her best and they would just need to re-prioritize the works so they could have the right goal and the right expectation.
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