I recalled when the girls were much younger from their infancies through their toddler years. I spent countless hours with them. I abandoned my own ego on climbing the corporate ladder. In fact I even took many steps down so I could be there for them. A lot of story times, playing with stuff animals, puppet show games, puzzles, and more story times. We even enrolled them to the Parents participant school so we could be part of the early educators for them. My focus then was providing them with a lot of love, and cuddling so they are well equipped with feeling of acceptance that would last them a lifetime. Only then they learn to love.
Moving on from their toddler years to school age. I spent innumerable hours on building their right habits. Giving them a lot of encouragements. My tolerance level was extremely high. Hardly ever I lost myself in front of them. I gave them a lot of praises hoping they would learn confidence, patience and appreciation. Still a lot of love, and cuddling couple with encouragements so they are well equipped with feeling of acceptance, and encouragement that would last them a lifetime. Only then they learn to love, and confidence.
Moving from school age to real school. I spent unlimited hours reading with them, checking their homework, reading their essays, and studying with them. Giving them uncounted supports. You name it, and I was there. My focus then was providing them solid foundation on both academic and social skills that they can build upon. Only then they would possess the right attitude to yearn for knowledge and the right skill to set forth into society one day. This was also the time when I sent them to learn many things beyond their levels hoping to challenge them to think outside the box. Still with a lot of love, cuddling, encouragements, and approvals so they are well equipped with feeling of acceptance, encouragement, and approval that would last them a lifetime. Only then they learn to love, confidence and like themselves.
courtesy of all-about-motherhood.com
Moving on from elementary to middle school. This time, I was aiming at independent. I gradually letting go my hands so they could stand still without me. But I was always there behind them making sure they choose the right path. I treated them with fairness and honesty, recognized their achievements . Still with a lot of love, cuddling, encouragements, approvals and honesty so they are well equipped with feeling acceptance, encouragement, approval and honesty that would last them a lifetime. Only then they learn to love, confidence, like themselves and truthfulness.
Moving from middle school to high school. This time, I was there merely to support my girl. She made all of the decisions and my job was to ensure she stays in the right path. Providing her with some resources that she needs. Giving her reassurances that she needs. Listening to her complaining about her world. Only then she will have the courage to stand up for herself and know that I am by her side. Still with a lot of love, cuddling, encouragements, approvals, honesty and reassurances so she is well equipped with feeling acceptance, encouragement approval, honesty and reassurance that would last her a lifetime. Only then she learns to love, confidence, like herself, truthfulness as well as having faith in themselves.
Little did I know that my parenting style has evolved through times but some things remain the same. Hugging and loving uphold through times. Like my girl reminds me from time to time. "Mom, you smell like my mommy. The sort of scent that makes me feel secure and comfortable."
I never thought this journey of mine would be so meaningful until I have both girls. They make my life complete. I wonder as my parenting style keeps evolving, what would be the next evolution? Have your parenting style evolved through times?
Until next stop,
Journey of Life